He wanted a divorce…
and ended up accused being of having an affair…
I know….WTF?
This guy (let’s call him Pete) met with me saying he wanted to get divorced.
I enquired why and he told me because his wife doesn’t love him anymore after 20+ years of marriage.
I asked, how did he know this…
His response was that they were only intimate once or twice a year.
I know….typical bloke eh lol?
His belief was no sex = no love.
I asked what else his wife does for him.
He told me how she did his washing for him, cooked for him and this last one blew me away…
Filled his beer fridge for him.
This confused me, if his wife didn’t love him why would she wash his stinking socks & jocks?
He said she had to do her washing anyway, so why wouldn’t she do his at the same time.
He explained that his wife had to eat, so she might as well cook for both of them.
I asked, did she drink cold beer too….he said no, she drank wine.
I asked him to try on a new perspective.
Every time he put on clean undies
Or ate a cooked meal.
Or supped on a cold beer …. that he allowed himself to feel loved.
He told me that this was stupid and I was wasting his time.
He left the meeting...
2 weeks later, something strange happened.
He texted me asking to meet up again...
When we did, he explained that his wife thought he was having an affair
What the fuck?
I asked how we got to this point.
Pete explained that he’d done what I suggested.
He realised that his wife did love him and he was being a dickhead – his words, not mine.
So, he started doing things around the house and one day brought her a bunch of flowers.
It was at this point his wife accused him of having an affair.
He told her that he was seeing this Life Coach bloke (but didn’t tell her the real reason why) and she didn’t believe him.
He asked if I would call her and explain.
So I called Pete's wife and explained who I was and that Pete had sought me out for some marital advice.
Pete went on to work with me through the True You Program and the outcomes speak for themselves...
He is still married to his wife.
They are now both very happy.
And they are starting to plan their retirement together.
If Pete hadn’t reached out he would be divorced now.
The emotional heartbreak.
Tens of thousands of dollars in legal bills.
Working out who gets what.
Even more... the emotional pressure on his family and friends to support him through the process.
There are so many men currently in the same place as Pete was.
If they continue to bury their heads in the sand…
They will end up divorced... sooner or later.
What are your thoughts?
Do you know people out there who are doing this right now?
What would you say to them?
Wherever you are in the world, take care and be kind to yourself
Steve Barker
I am Enough Coaching
www.iamenoughcoaching.com